Cosmos Will Once Reawaken
Written by Goddezz Of Chaos, MSTed by [names removed to protect
the brave and tortured]
Washu: What are you doing, Rii?
Riikii: Looking up fanfiction. Except ffnet won't load.
Washu: *checks screen* ...So you're looking up Mediaminer? How
desperate are you?
Riikii: Aww, what's the worst that can hap-- *looks at screen,
eyes explode*
Washu: Dammit, woman, now I'm going to have to clean this up.
Summary: After the battle with Chaos , serenity died , but she was reborn again as Bloom , of the winx club .
Washu: *quickly puts on protective goggles before her own eyes
follow suit* Winx Club? Dare I ask what that is?
Ki-chan: *peers over her shoulder* Isn't that the horribly
teenybopper sexist crap Cartoon Network picked up? Where girls
are taught to be pretty and it's the boys that are taught
leadership?
Luna-chan: Oh, I've heard of that one. The pedophilia promoter,
right? Where all the girls are scantily clad and fourteen?
Washu: I'm disturbed.
Luna-chan: You should be. The smart girl is, quote, "emotionless"
and will "discover strong feelings inside herself" so
she can turn to the side of Fashion and Beauty.
Washu: And now, I'm infuriated.
Ki-chan: Someone call tia, we've got a double-header for her.
SM DEMENSION
Washu: Dimension. Goddamnit, you could at least refrain from
raping scientific terms >_<
Riikii: *blinks with newly fixed eyes* Hey, I don't need glasses
anymore! *looks back at screen, eyes explode again* Aw, damn.
Cosmos : Chaos , today you defeated me , but in the future , I will destroy you !!
Ki-chan: Oh noes!
Luna-chan: End of teh world!!1
Washu: Wait, the bad guys win? Maybe this has one redeeming
quality?
Ki-chan: Any it might have had went out the window when it
invoked Winx.
Luna-chan: I thought we were bashing the fic, not the show.
Riikii: *adjusts goggles* They're both equally bad.
Chaos : Maybe I will destroy you first !!
tia: *walks in, eyes fic* Geez, if you're going to threaten a
scout, at least be a little less wussy about it. Maybe's such a
weak word.
Ki-chan: *whispers* Wow, she's taking it straight in the eye.
That's guts.
Riikii: *whispers back* It's because she's a Sue herself. A mild
Sue, to be sure, but one nonetheless. Gives her partial immunity.
tia: *glares at the group* And who do we have to blame for that,
hmm?
Riikii: *innocent whistle*
MAGIC REALM
Washu: ...you know, I think I actually liked 'demension' better.
Today was after the battle with the three witches .
Riikii: Which one? Seems all they do is angst, fight the
"evil" witches, and lust after the airheaded men.
tia: Witches?
Riikii: Oh, yes, witches are evil. And faeries are the good guys.
See, you can learn to be a fairy.
Washu: What...but that... *explodes*
Riikii: Okay, that was totally NOT my fault.
tia: Right. Get to cleaning.
Bloom , Stella , Flora , Techna , and Musa , and all the girls at Alfea
Luna-chan: Where they learn ENCHAMTED auras!
Others: *blink at her*
Luna-chan: Straight from the website, yo.
Riikii: *looks at the website* OH GOD THE GLARING PINK
tia: *puts sword through computer screen* There, problem solved.
Riikii: Hey, I needed that!
were sitting around the large tables at the hall and were rejoicing because they finished the battle .
Ki-chan: Always a great reason to get drunk
celebrate.
Riikii: Ki-chan, they're underage! For, well, everything.
Ki-chan: Which means that you're probably feeling very guilty
about those perverted thoughts I'm sure you're having.
Riikii: *puts face in hands* Oh god, yes.
The Cloud Tower and Red Fountain students were there too .
They were all chattiing happily .
Ki-chan: As opposed to chattiing intelligently.
Riikii: Consider the source material. This is probably the best
we'll get.
tia: Yeah, at least my fandom has lesbians.
( In this story , Bloom is with Prince Sky , the blond hair one ,
tia: Shock. We're discussing pairings in a Sailor Moon fandom.
Ki-chan: Actually, that's probably a Winx thing.
Luna-chan: Because goodness forbid we put an inane author's note
at the beginning of the story instead of the middle.
Riikii: And goodness forbid you actually, you know, write it out
instead of posting an author's note.
but later when a trip to his kingdom , is when his parents were against them dating . Techna
tia: Techna? What kind of parents name their kids--nevermind,
it's fandom.
Ki-chan: No, that's a Winx thing, too. She's the smart one. You
know, because you have to be sure she's the one that loves techy
stuff.
Washu: Okay, stop. Otherwise I'll be tempted to disintigrate you
before I disintigrate them.
is with Timmy and that's all .
tia: What's this? More pairings? No! Hell, let's just throw in the Wing boys and have a massive orgy.
Bloom has her memories . )
Ki-chan: Which ones?
tia: There's more than one?
Ki-chan: I dunno, I seem to recall something about her having old
memories of being a princess elsewhere. It was real wangsty, so I
forgot most of it.
A crash has surprised them
tia: Wimps. It has to be an explosion before it startles me.
Riikii: Or anything remotely non-human.
tia: They were LOBSTER GIRLS. What else was I supposed to think?
Riikii: Actually, one was a crab.
all as they all jumped out of the there seats .
Luna-chan: Quite a leap.
Ki-chan: Yeah, jumping out of here seats is less of a stretch on
the legs.
The guys all pulled out there as the alfea girls transformed .
Washu: ...for no reason!
tia: Talk about jumpy.
Riikii: This from the girl that transformed in public the first
time she saw a Pokemon.
tia: It looked like a youma!
Bloom was surprised and she almost fainted for she
tia: Is a bigger weenie than Serena.
Riikii: Dear, she IS Serena.
tia: Oh god, suck meets even bigger suck.
never thought that she will see another monster like this one . There were five all togther .
Luna: The whole cast was proud for her being able to count that WITHOUT using her fingers.
They all look hideous and ugly .
Luna-chan: But of COURSE! Goodness knows they couldn't be evil
if they were pretty!
tia: At least youma get cleaveage.
Riikii: More than you, I might add.
The leader is a half cat , half serpent andshowed her fangs out . It was a youma .
tia: Not if it ain't got breasts, it ain't.
Riikii: Congratulations, we survived the first chapter.
Washu: Can we go now?
Riikii: Oh, my, no...There were four chapters so I grabbed them
all. Somehow, it's "complete." Don't worry, I'm sure
there's not even a hundred words here.
Ki-chan: You realize we're putting in like five words to her
every one?
Riikii: Intelligence's a bitch, ainnit?
Bloom : Youmas . ( whispered )
tia: Retards. *screamed*
Youma Leader : Our leader , Queen Berly ,
Riikii: ...queen Berly? Now I'm getting this image of a
massive, hair-covered woman, and I didn't need more brain trauma.
Luna-chan: Neither did we, but thanks for sharing!
will be the new queen of this realm , and you all must obey our every command !!!
Washu: Like that ever works? Believe me, I've tried.
Riikii: *suspicious glance* On what, may I ask?
Washu: You heard nothing.
Sky : Like we ever will !! With all our powerful magic users in this realm , we will beat you all easily .
tia: Ten bucks says I can take them.
Riikii: Twenty says *I* can, and I'm just a short chick.
Bloom : ( whispered ) No , they can't defeat it ,
tia: See, now I know even YOU can.
and how did Berly survived !? She is supposed to be dead , sealed .
Washu: This is why I always say, check the corpse. God. Does no one ever check for a pulse?
Youma : You , beat us !? Don't make us laugh ,
Riikii: Don't worry, there's nothing funny about this.
Ki-chan: I'm just impressed at their ability to not shoot blood
from their eyes.
we ae creatures of the darkness and the only peoples who had beaten us was
tia: Me.
Riikii: People that could speak correct English.
Ki-chan: *points to tia* Okay, maybe not her.
these other magic users in another galaxy and they are all dead now .
tia: And you didn't let me help? Bastards!
We will rule the world !!!!
Washu: Please, the world is such crappy real estate. Now, Mars....
The youmas attacked and Bloom went behind a pillar to watch to how they will process .
Ki-chan: Sheesh, woman, don't be such a weenie.
Riikii: C'mon, you didn't expect her to fight when she can angst,
right?
They were doing okay but mostly of them were drained of there energys .
Luna-chan: Oh noez! Our energys!!
Bloom narrowed her eyes .
Riikii: Because that's going to do a lot.
tia: Watch me tremble in fear of the preteen girl.
Finally they defeated the youmas butd some of them were left with bruises .
Luna-chan: *as fairie* OH NOEZ!! Bruises! My fashion life is ruined!
They all then went home
Ki-chan: Because like, talking about potential enemies is, like, stupid. Not when I have my manicurist waiting!
as all the principals decided that they will look into
there library to see if they can find any sources about the new
enemy .
Bloom looked at the beautiful moon
Riikii: tia, as much as it's bringing out her and your lesbian
tendencies, put your skirt back down.
tia: Stop ruining my fun, woman, I haven't even done the pressed
ham yet.
as Kiko slept soundly on her bed .
Riikii: Not just lesbians...underage lesbians! I'm so going to hell.
She never knew that she would have to start fighting once again and this would be the third time with Berly .
tia: Wait, when was the second?
Riikii: When was the FIRST?
It would be easy for she is
Riikii: MARY SUE!
Cosmos but she felt that Berly has joined forces with Nephrina . How will she be able to defeat them without her scouts ?
tia: How can she scratch her nose without her precious harem
scouts?
Ki-chan: Congratulations, my young grasshopper, you have mastered
the art of strikethrough text.
She felt that they were alive
Riikii: Thanks to plot device.
Luna-chan: It's the only plot they could get.
and would come fond her soon for she felt them right efore she feel in a deep sleep .
The moon above shined brightly cause it was
Washu: A full moon.
happy
Washu: A full moon with a noted lack of emotions.
to know that it's daughter was alive and safe .
Washu: A full moon with a noted lack of emotions that is most certainly NOT capable of producing a human child.
It will protect her even if it's the last thing it does .
Washu: How is a large clump of space rock going to protect a
human? By crashing into her enemies?
Riikii: Effective way to end the story, at least. Rock falls,
everyone dies!
The next day , Bloom woke up as she waklked to the hall for breakfeast .
Luna-chan: She was obviously intoxicated, as her inability to
spell indicated.
Riikii: The author or the character? Damnit, going to hell again.
The witches and the knights have left .
Ki-chan: Yeah, that happened already. Where were you?
Riikii: *as author* Dude, that was a whole twenty words ago. You
can't possibly expect me to remember back that far.
She missed Sky .
Ki-chan: Abscence makes the heart grow less shallow.
Luna-chan: So does abstinence.
She yawned and sat down withher friends and ate .
Peasants:
LATER
Bloom then recieved a letter from Sky saying that he was at his
kingdom and they are creating a ball . He told her to invite her
friends too . He also said taht he wanted her to meet his parents
. She blushed as she read this part and the others teased her .
Riikii: Well, I can guess where they're meeting her.
Ki-chan: Okay, that's like the fourth time you're going to hell
for this fic alone.
Musa : My , my Bloom , meeting parents already !? I never thought that you would be the first of all five of us to get married !!??
Washu: *choke*
Luna-chan: But is it really statutory if they're both underage?
Bloom : Musa !! It's not like that !!
Riikii: Oh yes it is. Now jump in the handbasket.
The letter said to invite you guys too .
Stella : He probably wanted us to accompany you , oh and I got a
letter too saying that I was to go in place of Solaria since
father is busy !
Ki-chan Now this is totally out of character. She's not stupid
enough, rude enough, complaining about someone's fashion, or
using enough "like"s.
Riikii: Isn't that a little stereotypical.
Ki-chan: Um. The characters ARE stereotypes. Where have you been?
ADnyways , when are you marrying ?
Riikii: Hopefully never. The idea of those things breeding is
almost as scary as imagining my old high school drunk jock "president"
breeding.
Luna-chan: Um, he is. He married a cheerleader.
Riikii: *commits ritual suicide* THERE IS NO GOD
tia: I'd hope not, what with the number of times we've been
invoking his name in this.
Techna : According to my calculations , they will get married adn have kids probably in two years after they get married .
Washu: And according to my actual, scientific calculations,
you're a poser.
Riikii: Go easy on her, Washu, you can't expect her to be
intelligent if the author isn't.
Bloom : That fast !? Your exagerating !!
Ki-chan: For all our sakes, we hope so.
Flora : But dear , techna is right , we must be auties to
them .
Bloom : Flora !! You too !!!???
Thay all laughed and joked until night came .
Luna-chan: This scene made me weep a single, emo tear.
Ki-chan: Was it black?
Riikii: This makes me fear for our future. *points at the others*
You! You're not breeding fast enough! Get to work, the stupid
people are overtaking us!
Ki-chan: *dryly* In that case, invite us to your wedding.
Riikii: Dammit, I didn't mean ME!
Bloom climbed into bed as she thought about it .
tia: What I want to know is, the other girl still in there?
The time gates didnt let her see the future
tia: Tsk. She's not making full use of her Sueness!
Riikii: Neither are you...your personality could certainly use a
power-up.
tia: I do not embrace the Sueness, I reject it.
and that means that something is going to happen at the Draconia Kingdom .
Riikii: A chicken will be eaten.
Ki-chan: Someone will drop a cookie.
tia: I will kill someone.
Riikii: Maybe after the fic.
( I forgot Sky ' s kingdom's name so gomen )
tia: Research? What's THAT?
Washu: *makes strangling motions*
they were sent by
Luna-chan: First class mail!
Riikii: That's far too good for them. Parcel post.
a carriage and when they got there , they were tidied up and to get ready for the ball .
Ki-chan: Because with unknown enemies looming over your head, what ELSE is there to do but have a ball?
Bloom met up with Sky and he looked so handsome in his prince attire , even more handsome than Endymion .
Ki-chan: Sorry, Darien, I can only wait so many lifetimes for
you.
Luna-chan: Yeah, when I said our love was "eternal", I
didn't really mean it.
She shook her head at the thought of Endymion . The ball didn't last long
All: YAY!
Riikii: Even the peasants are with us on this one.
Peasants: *wave banners and blow airhorns*
as a crash was heard and 200 youmas came out of the smoke .
Riikii: Two hundred EXACTLY.
Luna-chan: That's mad counting skills, man.
Ki-chan: Nice to know their first grade education didn't go to
waste even if the rest of it did.
Leader : We have already conquered 2 kingdoms and this will be the third .
tia: Must've been really wussy kingdoms.
Riikii: Yeah, I'm seeing a pattern.
Sky readied his sword and everybody charged and attacked . She transformed and attacked too .
Riikii: Which outfit, the Sailor uniform or the skimpy Trampsy
Winx uniform?
tia: They're both pretty skimpy.
Riikii: Yes, but I expect it from the Japanese!
They were all attacking
tia: As opposed to sitting around picking their noses. Well, DUH.
and didn't notice two shadows on top of the roof .
Washu: Well, one would think if one was fighting off a few hundred youma at once, they might be a little too preoccupied to notice.
The two figures were wearing sailor outfits , one orange , the other green .
tia: Gee, I wonder who THAT is.
Riikii: You know any other Scouts that like to sit on their asses
and do nothing?
tia: Besides all of them?
Bloom was secretly using some of Mars powers
Washu: Since when can she do that?
tia: I...don't know....YOU'LL GET MINE OVER MY DEAD BODY, BITCH!
*attacks the fic*
Riikii: -_- Don't worry, tia, I'm sure she's quite unaware of
your existance.
and the two sailors smiled and once again conceled themselves .
tia: Because gods forbid you DO your FUCKING JOBS, asshats. -_- Gods, they disgrace the rest of the Outers.
Everybody kept battling and they were getting tired ,
Ki-chan: ...of this fic.
as some were losing energy ,
Luna-chan: Drat, I just restocked on energys!
Sky was protecting his parents and only at the end , they were huddled in a corner
tia: Being useless. Are there only TWO people in that whole room that can throw a punch? Geez.
and about a hundred youmas were still alive
Ki-chan: About? What happened to those mad counting skills?
Luna-chan: Must've run out of counting energys.
and the peopkes were injured .
Riikii: Oh noes! More bruises!
Bloom was almost going to use her powers
tia: *as Bloom* Oh, drat, I have to be useful now!
until she heard two long forgotten voices .
Voice : Mercury Aqua Raphsody !!!
Voice : Mars Flame Snipers !!!
Riikii: Clearly, an unexpected twist.
tia: *still as Bloom* Oh, yay! My ass got saved without me having
to lift a finger! I was worried I was, you know, going to have to
fight, and what if I broke a nail?
Riikii: Okay, stop, you're worrying me.
both attacks destroyed about fifty of the hundred left
Washu: Well, that was pretty ineffective.
tia: Can I have the rest?
Washu: I'll make you some later.
tia: ^_^ Yay!
Riikii: Damnit, Washu, stop encouraging her.
as Bloom turned towards the doors to see two silloutes at the door ,
Washu: What's a 'silloute'?
Riikii: I don't know, where did the second door go?
under the moonlight as if it led them there ,
Luna-chan: *as Scouts* Forcefully dragged, is more like! I was just finishing my jigsaw puzzle too!
were a girl with short blue hair with a blue sailor outfit and a ice harp . The other girl was a girl with violet eyes , raven hair , and a red sailor outfit in high heels ,
tia: Which are really stupid to fight in. Kept waiting for the bitch to break an ankle.
with a fire bow and arrow .
Ki-chan: *fake surprise* Oh, gee! I wonder who THEY are! I've
never seen them before!
tia: I only WISH I'd never seen them before.
Riikii: Congratulations, you've survived the "ending".
Washu: I'd ask what happened, but these goggles are making my
face itch, and I have work to do. C'mon, tia, you're leading the
next youma force against this fic.
tia: Hot damn! *follows Washu out*
Riikii: Eh...I'll allow it.